About Me

I graduated from BYU in Audiology and Speech Language Pathology and I am working as an SLPL at a school district. I enjoy it and it keeps me SUPER busy. I also teach spin classes at LA Fitness. I refuse to ever pay for a gym membership. I live with 2 awesome girls: Erika and Christina. I love Diet Dr. Pepper, ritz crackers, bunny tracks ice cream, shopping, cooking, sleeping, reading, and working out. I have the 4 cutest nephews in the world: Kaden, Jack, Nixon and Bentley and 1 adorable niece: Alena. This is my simple yet really awesome life!

Friday, February 27, 2009

Could it be any worse??

A Mother passing by her son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then she saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to "Mom". With the worst premonition she opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.

Dear Mom,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Dad and you. I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercings, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it's not only the passion...Mom she's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it. Don't worry Mom. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.

Love, Your Son

Paul

P.S. Mom, none of the above is true. I'm over at Dustin's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the report card that's in my center desk drawer. I love you. Call me when it's safe to come home.


Haha!! This is so something my brother Spencer would do.

Have a good weekend!!

3 comments:

Lyndsay said...

Haha, thats a pretty good one!

Alan and Rachel Shumway said...

OK THAT IS FREAKIN SO SAD AND THEN SO HILARIOUS IN LESS THAN 30 SECS.

Heather said...

Thanks for the sweet comment on my blog! I will agree with you, he is amazing!

Love the story! I was extremely nervous in the beginning, but was extremely happy by the end!